I mean, my life isn't perfect per se, but it's exactly what I want it to be. I still bicker with my husband, I still have bills to pay, and my dishes still don't clean themselves. But my life is moving forward in so many new and exciting ways that I never thought would happen but always wanted to happen and now it's like BOOM. Stuff is happening lady! You asked for it and your wish was granted!
Thursday was my last full-time day at work.
I start school full-time on Tuesday.
I have 16 days off work before I start part-time.
I got a new apartment sized fridge which means we can fit a table in our kitchen.
I have started exercising and am actually sticking with my schedule.
I have an amazing family and great friends surrounding me.
I am eating healthier and feeling good.
I am happy.
These are all things I'm energized about so why do I think something bad will happen? I have earned all of what I have, so maybe I'm just nervous about all the new changes and this is the way it's manifesting itself.
At the same time, when I look at my past I'm usually correct in thinking that something is going to happen that I don't want to happen. That's what makes life, well, life. Things happen. I've always been able to accept those unexpected changes, albeit not always gracefully, and none of them have ruined me.
I guess I need to just embrace what I have now and stop trying to worry about what might happen. It's much easier said then done, but at least if I have that goal on my mind, I can actively try to push the bad thoughts away.
Does anybody else feel like this at times? How do you deal with it?
I don't want to leave this post feeling so forlorn, so here's a picture of me smiling!