Monday, April 18, 2011

Bras.

Want to know how to turn me into a big baby who cries and throws tantrums?

Make me go bra shopping.

I hate it with a passion. Bra shopping is one of the worst things for me to do. I would prefer to walk the dogs in sandals in a blizzard! 

Why do I hate bra shopping so much?

Because I have a big torso and small boobs. I really don't mind the big torso or the small boobs, except the fact that there are maaaaaybe three size 36A bras in an entire store. 

A couple weeks ago my friend Veronica and I went bra shopping and we tried on probably 15 bras and NONE fit. Not a SINGLE ONE. How's that for depressing? And I'm not picky at all. If it covers my chest and doesn't make it look like tipis are on my chest, I'm fine. But I couldn't even find that.

We started at Victoria's Secret, and I was so sure we would find something there. We only saw 4 styles of bras in a 36A {and they were so kindly placed next to the 36C and 36D, to make us feel extra good about our boob size} and they didn't fit well enough to pay the $42. So we went to JC Penneys. And then Dillards. And then Sears. NOTHING. So we left and spent our bra money on sushi, which was delicious.

Over the past week I've bought 2 bras from Target and 2 from Walmart, but didn't try them on at the store. When I got home, though, they of course didn't fit, so I returned them this weekend. 

With the cash I got back I decided to go to Kohl's. I had gotten a $10 Kohl's Cash {which is awesome, it's a gift card!} in the mail from them and wanted to spend it. I tried on 19, yes NINETEEN bras, and none fit. There was one that kind of fit, but I'd have to wear a tank top with a built in bra, so that kind of defeated the purpose of it.

One thing that annoyed me was a lady in the stall next to me. She tried on six bras and, as she discussed over the phone, the problem she was having was that all of hers fit so perfectly, she just couldn't decide on a print. Go to hell, lady. Go. To. Hell.

So why even wear a bra? If I hate them so much, why deal with them? 
Simple: BECAUSE MEN ARE CREEPS. 

Well, some of them. Particularly the ones that comment on the fact that I am not wearing a bra. Wouldn't you think it's completely innapropriate to do that? I mean, they are JUST BOOBS. Everyone has them, just like everyone poops.

A couple years ago, when I was still working at a restaurant {Black Bean} and the library, I forgot to wear a bra. I rarely wore a bra at Black Bean and that day I happened to go straight from there to the library. I didn't think it was that big of a deal. Well, I guess I put to much hope in society, because many people stared, and a couple men made comments. What the hell?! 

After that day, I've always worn a bra to work. I still don't wear them on the weekends or any time I'm not at work though, because I can tell someone to fuck off at the grocery store, but not at work!

So instead of buying a new bra, I bought some shirts. Yes, a few of them were the maternity shirts I talked about. :-D


They fit like a dream. 

18 comments:

  1. Hahahaha I love it. And I hate bra shopping with a passion too. It's so discouraging. And super annoying having to take your shirt off the five times you have to go back into the stall before you find one that actually fits. I feel your pain.

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  2. Bras NEVER fit ANYONE (so that lady was a liar, or a mannequin). I am convinced that they are always ill-fitting. You are not alone.

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  3. I haven't had a well-fitting bra since high school. I've even been bra-fitted by JCPenney and Victoria's Secret and neither one of them came up with anything that fit or felt comfortable for me.
    Boys are so lucky.

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  4. Okay..you cracked me up....probably at the point where you stated that everyone poops. I adore you! Ha ha! I like to tailor my bra's a little. I am...(keep in mind I am a big girl, so of course I got big uns)...a 40DDD...and I gotta make sure that I am secured. I wear the Big ol' granny looking like Playtex...and I love them. I even have leisure bra's so that I can be comfortable no matter what and can even wear those sleeping if I want. I would not worry if I were you. If I were your size (which I think is a good size lady...especially because your skinny and if they were super big you'd fall over)...I'd wear sports bra's everyday. If I was cold or whatever and people looked or said something...I'd tell them that I don't remember asking for their opinion (much like I do now when people comment on my appearance)...or I'd state that their comments are very inappropriate and you'de appreciate it if they could nicely shut the f#!* up. Hee hee! I did a swear. :) Goodluck in the search for the perfect bra and the perfect people...or maybe you could just settle for comfort and blow people off. :) Hearts, Janna lynn

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  5. As sad as it is, I'm glad I'm not alone! hehe

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  6. Tailoring bras is a good idea! That night I was thinking about what I could do to just make my own, or alter one I have to fit decently. I'll have to think about it a little more and just do it. And I used to ALWAYS wear sports bras, like all through high school. My wardrobe has been changing the past year though and most of my clothes don't really work with a sports bra. =/

    I think I'll listen to you though and say screw the world! hahaha

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  7. Want to know a secret? The very best bras EVER are nursing bras. I don't know why, but seriously try one sometime. Unfortunately, they are a little more noticeable through shirts due to all the extra clasps etc but it might be worth it . . .

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  8. So I'm supposed to walk around in a nursing bra with my maternity shirt?! Hahaha I'll look and see if they have one small enough for me and try one on!

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  9. The good news is you're already set for child-bearing. Pick up a crib and some diapers, call it good. =D

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  10. Sushi FTW! Also, kind of really glad I don't have to deal with library creeps anymore... So disturbing. Good luck on the bra quest!

    Also, why does your comment thing give me so many options to say who I am?? Ahh! Choices!

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  11. I already have diapers {for my niece!} AND a baby carrier {like the one you strap to yourself like a backpack..but with a baby in it...and I got it because it wa only $2!} sooooo ya. Ahem. Moving on. Hahahah

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  12. Ya, library creeps ARE disturbing! And it gives you options?! It doesn't give me options, so I don't know what it is haha

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  13. LOLLLL MEN ARE CREEPS, especially patrons at the library lmao!

    FORGET bra shopping =[ lol

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  14. Hmmmm--thought I was the only one that had that problem. Try the Jockey girls bra's (formerly called training bras). They now come in styles that look like bras--not pads for your chest and they even have adjustable straps, come in pink, white for colors and flowers, some with a cute little bow that comes right off with a bit of a snip!

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  15. I have baby blankets and outfits in my keepsake box and I can't even have kids lol so don't feel bad.

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  16. Ya, I hate that too! Or the rules that say you can only have 5 things in your stall at a time. Grr, I hate shopping!

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  17. I'll have to check those out! I don't think I've seen that brand at any of the stores I've gone to, I'll have to do a little research...

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